The gripe sheet... - TwoWheelForum: Motorcycle and Sportbike forums
 
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post #1 of 8 (permalink) Old 08-31-2006, 07:37 PM Thread Starter
 
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The gripe sheet...

No real point to this thread but to share this with you all. I got this from my mom today and it gave me a good laugh.

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After every flight, pilots fill out a form called a gripe sheet, which conveys to the mechanics problems encountered with the aircraft during the flight that need repair or correction. The mechanics read and correct the problem, and then respond in writing on the lower half of the form what remedial action was taken, and the pilot reviews the gripe sheets before the next flight. Never let it be said that ground crews and engineers lack a sense of humor! Here are some actual logged maintenence complaints and problems as submitted by Qantas pilots and the solution recorded by maintenence engineers.
(P= problem logged by the pilot)
(S= the solution and action taken by the engineers)

P:Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S:Almost replaced left inside main tire.

P:Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
S:Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.

P:Something loose in cockpit.
S:Something tightened in cockpit.

P: Dead bugs on windsheild.
S:Live bugs on back-order.

P :Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent.
S:Cannot reproduce problem on ground.

P:Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S:Evidence removed.

P: DME volume unbeliveably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.

P:Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S:That's what they're there for.

P:IFF inoperative.
S:IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.

P:Suspected crack in windshield.
S:Suspect you're right.

P:Number 3 engine missing.
S:Engine found on right wing after brief search.

P:Aircraft handles funny.
S:Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.

P:Target radar hums.
S:Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.

P:Mouse in cockpit.
S:Cat installed.

P:Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer.
S:Took hammer away from midget.
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Last edited by upshift; 08-31-2006 at 07:39 PM. Reason: smileys
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post #2 of 8 (permalink) Old 08-31-2006, 08:30 PM
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post #3 of 8 (permalink) Old 08-31-2006, 08:34 PM
 
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post #4 of 8 (permalink) Old 08-31-2006, 08:34 PM
 
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post #5 of 8 (permalink) Old 08-31-2006, 10:12 PM
 
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post #6 of 8 (permalink) Old 08-31-2006, 11:15 PM
 
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that was good humor
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post #7 of 8 (permalink) Old 09-01-2006, 04:29 AM
 
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That's good stuff right there!!
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post #8 of 8 (permalink) Old 09-01-2006, 06:22 AM
 
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Quote:
P:Aircraft handles funny.
S:Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious
That was my favorite.



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