Evening Humor.. - TwoWheelForum: Motorcycle and Sportbike forums
 
LinkBack Thread Tools Display Modes
post #1 of 4 (permalink) Old 11-19-2004, 06:06 PM Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Posts: 1,145
Evening Humor..

Hey guys! I thought this was funny, but so damn true..

To all my friends and family:

Thank you for making me safe, secure, blessed,
and wealthy by sending me your chain letters over
the last year.

Because of your concern:

I no longer drink Coca Cola because it can remove
toilet stains.

I no longer drink Pepsi or Dr. Pepper since the
people who make these products are atheists who
refuse to put "Under God" on their cans.

I no longer drink anything out of a can because I
will get sick from the rat feces and urine.

I no longer use Saran wrap in the microwave
because it causes cancer.

I no longer go to movies because I could sit on a
needle infected with AIDS.

I no longer check the coin return on pay phones
because I could get pricked with a needle infected
with AIDS.

I no longer use cancer causing deodorants even
though I smell like a wet dog on a hot day.

I no longer go to shopping malls because someone
will drug me with a perfume sample and try to rob
me.

I no longer receive packages from UPS or FedEx
since they are actually Al Qaida in disguise.

I no longer shop at Target since they are French
and don't support our American troops.

I no longer answer the phone because someone will
ask me to dial a stupid number for which I will
get the phone bill from hell with calls to Uganda,
Singapore, and Uzbekistan.

I no longer eat prepackaged foods because the
estrogen's they contain will turn me gay.

I no longer eat KFC because their chickens are
actually horrible mutant freaks with no eyes or
feathers.

I no longer look at the opposite sex because they
will take my kidneys and leave me taking a nap in
a bathtub full of ice.

I no longer have a cell phone but that will
change once I receive my new Ericcson phone.

I no longer have any sneakers but that will
change once I receive my free replacement pair from
Nike.

I no longer buy expensive cookies from Neiman
Marcus since I now have their recipe.

I no longer worry about my soul because I have
363,214 angels looking out for me.

I no longer have any savings because I gave it to
a sick girl about to die in the hospital for the
1,000th time.

I no longer have any money but that will change
once I receive the $15,000 that Microsoft and AOL
are sending me since I participated in their
special e-mail program.

I want to thank all of you soooooooo much for
looking out for me!

Now if you DON'T send this e-mail to at least
1200 people in the next 60 seconds a large bird
with diarrhea will crap on your head at 5:00 pm.
CharlieMavCBR is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
post #2 of 4 (permalink) Old 11-19-2004, 06:13 PM
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Posts: 7,333
Dang these are so true its not even funny.
GSXR1000DJ is offline  
post #3 of 4 (permalink) Old 11-19-2004, 07:24 PM
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Posts: 4,335
yeah, it's kind of sad, but I delete every e-mail without reading it if it was forwarded to me from my grandma. She ALWAYS sends that crap. If she needs something, the email is an original, so I will read those. But the ones that say fwd will ALWAYS get deleted without being read.
Captain Morgan is offline  
post #4 of 4 (permalink) Old 11-19-2004, 07:28 PM
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Posts: 9,263


I no longer use cancer causing deodorants even
though I smell like a wet dog on a hot day.

Dude, those are hysterical...but its amazing how many people actually take much of that to heart...gimme a break. if thats the case, you better not even get outta bed in the morning for fear you stub your toe, its gets infected and you die!!!!
Need4Speed is offline  
Sponsored Links
Advertisement
 
Reply

Quick Reply
Message:
Options

Register Now



In order to be able to post messages on the TwoWheelForum: Motorcycle and Sportbike forums forums, you must first register.
Please enter your desired user name, your email address and other required details in the form below.

User Name:
Password
Please enter a password for your user account. Note that passwords are case-sensitive.

Password:


Confirm Password:
Email Address
Please enter a valid email address for yourself.

Email Address:
OR

Log-in










Thread Tools
Show Printable Version Show Printable Version
Email this Page Email this Page
Display Modes
Linear Mode Linear Mode



Posting Rules  
You may post new threads
You may post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On

 
For the best viewing experience please update your browser to Google Chrome