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post #1 of 69 (permalink) Old 12-08-2004, 12:32 PM Thread Starter
 
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The Best Blonde Joke

Don't peak at the picture until you have read the following:

A few days ago I was having some work done at my local garage. A blonde came in and asked for a Seven-hundred-ten. We all looked at each other and another customer asked, "What is a seven-hundred-ten?" She replied, "You know, the little piece in the middle of the engine, I have lost it and need a new one." She said that she did not know the part by any other name, but this piece had always been there. The mechanic gave her a piece of paper and a pen and asked her to draw what the piece looked like. She drew a circle and in the middle of it wrote 710. He then took her over to another car, which had its hood up and asked, "Is there a 710 on this car?" She pointed and said, "Of course, its right there."
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post #2 of 69 (permalink) Old 12-08-2004, 05:16 PM
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I hope this isn't from personal expierence Pippi!! If it is I just lost all repect I had for you!!!

Everybody else was just scared to ask!!! Not me I'll like the beating from you!! You I say, not Twisty!!!




-Chris
aka Gas Man



Was: 2002 Kaw ZX-9R
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post #3 of 69 (permalink) Old 12-08-2004, 05:23 PM
 
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hhhmmmm... yeah!!!
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post #4 of 69 (permalink) Old 12-08-2004, 07:59 PM
 
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Too funny. Good one Pipster.
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post #5 of 69 (permalink) Old 12-08-2004, 08:34 PM
 
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This sounds like the blonde I ran into at the grocery

Why did the Blonde stare at a can of frozen orange juice?
- Because it said concentrate.
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post #6 of 69 (permalink) Old 12-08-2004, 11:22 PM
 
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Why can I see some of my friends doing that?
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post #7 of 69 (permalink) Old 12-09-2004, 09:34 AM
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I dont get it. LOL
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post #8 of 69 (permalink) Old 12-10-2004, 01:11 PM
 
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LOL How many times does this really happen? LOL
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post #9 of 69 (permalink) Old 12-12-2004, 12:50 AM
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my wife loves blond jokes thanks for some more ammo!! lol !!!
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post #10 of 69 (permalink) Old 12-12-2004, 01:15 AM
 
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omfg....the scary thing is...I know people who would actually do or say something like that
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post #11 of 69 (permalink) Old 12-12-2004, 11:40 AM
 
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OMG. That's bad. That's funny but bad. Yes everyone, we have people like this all around us on a daily basis!!!
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post #12 of 69 (permalink) Old 12-16-2004, 07:40 PM
 
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Blonde, Brunette and Redhead go into a bar

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead went into a bar and asked the bartender for some drinks:
Brunette: “I’ll have a B and C.”
Bartender: “What is a B and C?”
Brunette: “Bourbon and Coke.”
Redhead: “And, I’ll have a G and T.”
Bartender: “What’s a G and T?”
Redhead: “Gin and tonic.”
Blonde: “I’ll have a 15.”
Bartender: “What’s a 15?
Blonde: “7 and 7”
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post #13 of 69 (permalink) Old 12-16-2004, 07:42 PM
 
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What's your name, Blondie?

A blonde goes for a job interview and the interviewer starts with the basics. “Miss, would you please tell me your age?”
The blonde hesitates then starts to count carefully on her fingers for half a minute before finally saying. “I’m...ahh...22.”
The interviewer asks, “And how tall are you, please?”
The young lady stands up, pulls a measuring tape from her handbag, steps on one end and brings the other end to the top of her head. She checks the measurement and announces, “I’m five foot two.”
This isn’t looking too good so the interviewer goes for the real basics; something she won’t have to count, measure, or lookup. “Just to confirm for our records, what is your name please?”
The blonde bobs her head from side to side for about fifteen seconds, mouthing something silently to herself. finally, she says, “My name is Jenny.”
The interviewer is perplexed, but finally he asks, “What were you doing when I asked you your name?”
“I was just running through that song.”
“What song?”
“You know, ‘Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you, happy birthday dear...’”
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post #14 of 69 (permalink) Old 12-16-2004, 07:43 PM
 
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Blonde in the Casino

Two casino dealers are waiting idly at the craps table when a beautiful blonde comes in and asks if she could bet $10,000 on a single roll of the dice.
“And,” she adds, “I hope you don’t mind, but I feel much luckier when I’m naked.”
With that she takes off everything but her necklace, rolls the dice, then starts yelling, “Mama needs new clothes.”
When the dice stop she screams, “Yes, yes, yes! I won, I won, I won!” and she jumps up and down and, while still nude, she hugs and kisses both of the dealers passionately. Then she picks up the money, gathers all of her clothes and leaves.
The dealers can only stare at her very nude and well rounded shapely behind as it vanishes into the casino crowd, then one of the dealers ask, “What did she roll, anyway?"
The other answers, “I don’t know. I thought you were watching.”
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post #15 of 69 (permalink) Old 12-16-2004, 07:49 PM
 
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I love blonde jokes!!!
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post #16 of 69 (permalink) Old 12-16-2004, 07:59 PM
 
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On the street

Two blondes are walking down the street. One notices a compact on the sidewalk and leans down to pick it up. She opens it, looks in the mirror and says, “Hmmm, this person looks familiar.”
The second blonde says, “Here, let me see!” So the first blonde hands her the compact. She looks in the mirror and says, “You idiot, it’s me!”
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post #17 of 69 (permalink) Old 12-16-2004, 08:05 PM
 
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frozen blondes

Did you hear about the two blondes that were found frozen to death in their car at a drive-in movie theater?
- They went to see “Closed for the Winter.”
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post #18 of 69 (permalink) Old 12-16-2004, 08:06 PM
 
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Great stuff bee!!
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post #19 of 69 (permalink) Old 12-17-2004, 11:34 PM
 
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Blonde Kidnapper

A blonde was down on her luck. In order to raise money, she decided to kidnap a kid and hold him for ransom. So she went to a playground, grabbed a kid, and took him behind a tree.
“I’ve kidnapped you!,” said the blonde and then proceeded to write a note saying, “I’ve kidnapped your kid. Tomorrow morning, put $10,000 in a paper bag and place it under the pecan tree next to the playground. Signed, A Blonde.” The Blonde then pinned the note to the kid’s shirt and sent him home to show his parents.
The next morning the blonde checked under the tree and sure enough, a paper bag was sitting there. The Blonde opened the bag and found the $10,000 with a note that said, “How could you do this to a fellow blonde?”
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post #20 of 69 (permalink) Old 12-17-2004, 11:35 PM
 
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Smart Blonde

A blonde was bragging about her knowledge of state capitals. She proudly says, “Go ahead, ask me, I know all of them.”
A friend says, “O.K., what’s the capital of Wisconsin?”
The blonde replies, “Oh, that’s easy, W.”
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