When girls dont put out..... - TwoWheelForum: Motorcycle and Sportbike forums
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post #1 of 170 (permalink) Old 11-26-2007, 07:24 PM Thread Starter
 
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When girls dont put out.....

WHEN GIRLS DON'T PUT OUT


One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed.

Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, "I don't feel like
it, I just want you to hold me."

I said, "WHAT??!! What was that?!"

So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear...

"You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man."

She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, "Lets get a pair for each outfit."

We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis.

I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier."

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, "WHAT?"

I then said, "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman."

And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that b!t*h knows I'm smarter than her.



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post #2 of 170 (permalink) Old 11-26-2007, 07:27 PM
 
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that's hilarious.
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post #3 of 170 (permalink) Old 11-26-2007, 07:28 PM
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post #4 of 170 (permalink) Old 11-26-2007, 07:31 PM
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best story evar!

2005 Honda CRF88RR - 2007 Honda CBR600RR
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post #5 of 170 (permalink) Old 11-26-2007, 08:09 PM
 
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that was awesome
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post #6 of 170 (permalink) Old 11-26-2007, 09:26 PM
 
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I would love to say the face on her!
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post #7 of 170 (permalink) Old 11-26-2007, 09:41 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jnn7404 View Post
I would love to see the face on her!
fixed it for ya
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post #8 of 170 (permalink) Old 11-26-2007, 09:43 PM
 
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fixed it for ya
Thanks! I didn't even catch it
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post #9 of 170 (permalink) Old 11-26-2007, 09:46 PM
 
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whatever ya all do..... DO NOT let SVRider read this. He will, I repeat, he will use this to his advantage.... Advantage, is that the word I am looking for??? Great post though.
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post #10 of 170 (permalink) Old 11-26-2007, 09:55 PM
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good one!

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".. speed, you can't touch it, but you damn sure can feel it! "
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post #11 of 170 (permalink) Old 11-26-2007, 10:00 PM
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That is awsome I wish I had the balls to do that ahahha

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post #12 of 170 (permalink) Old 11-26-2007, 10:53 PM
 
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Very nicely done.
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post #13 of 170 (permalink) Old 11-27-2007, 12:07 AM
 
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That was friggin' excellent.
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post #14 of 170 (permalink) Old 11-27-2007, 01:44 AM
 
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that was funny but unfortunately very very true. i guess thats why i never stay w/ a girl long enough? cuz i aint got the $$ to buy em stuff.
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post #15 of 170 (permalink) Old 11-27-2007, 03:25 AM
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Thats awsome! I printed it out n put it on a wall here cus alot of the guys here in iraq have no money cause there SO is back in the states spending it all up!!
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post #16 of 170 (permalink) Old 11-27-2007, 04:11 AM
 
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Classic!!
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post #17 of 170 (permalink) Old 11-27-2007, 05:00 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by p00kienrayray View Post
that was funny but unfortunately very very true. i guess thats why i never stay w/ a girl long enough? cuz i aint got the $$ to buy em stuff.
I hear you
and the fact is, I don't care quite frankly.
In and out of my life but not before a little action.
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post #18 of 170 (permalink) Old 11-27-2007, 06:52 AM
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I've seen that before. Very funny, now go out and try it yourself and seen what really happens.
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post #19 of 170 (permalink) Old 11-27-2007, 08:41 AM
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Being in a relationship really is like having a long term prostitute. You really do pay for it one way or another.

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post #20 of 170 (permalink) Old 11-27-2007, 08:54 AM
 
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That's awesome.
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