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post #1 of 20 (permalink) Old 04-05-2005, 11:29 AM Thread Starter
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The North & South

alittle somenton I stole from the net


The North has coffee houses, The South has
Waffle Houses.

The North has dating services, The South has
family reunions.

The North has double last names, The South has
double first names.
The North has Cream of Wheat, The South has grits.

The North has green salads, The South has
collard greens.

The North has lobsters, The South has crawdads.

FOR NORTHERNERS MOVING SOUTH:

In the South: If you run your car into a ditch,
don't panic. Four men in a four-wheel drive
pickup truck with a tow chain will be along
shortly. Don't try to help them, just stay out
of their way. This is what they live for.
Don't be surprised to find movie rentals and
bait in the same store.......do not buy food at
this store.

Remember, "y'all" is singular, "all y'all" is
plural, and "all y'all's' is plural possessive.
Get used to hearing "You ain't from round here,
are ya?"
Save all manner of bacon grease. You will be
instructed later on how to use it.

Don't be worried at not understanding what
people are saying. They can't understand you either.

The first Southern statement to creep into a
transplanted Northerner's vocabulary is the
adjective "big'ol," truck or "big'ol" boy. Most
Northerners begin their Southern- influenced
dialect this way. All of them are in denial
about it.
The proper pronunciation you learned in school
is no longer proper.

Be advised that "He needed killin" is a valid
defense here.

If you hear a Southerner exclaim, "Hey, y'all,
watch this," you should stay out of the way.
These are likely to be the last words he'll ever
say.


Do not be surprised to find that 10-year-olds
own their own shotguns, they are proficient
marksmen, and their mammas taught them how to aim.


In the South, we have found that the best way to
grow a lush green lawn is to pour gravel on it
and call it a driveway.
AND REMEMBER:

If you do settle in the South and bear children,
don't think we will accept them as Southerners.
After all, if the cat had kittens in the oven,
we wouldn't call 'em biscuits.

For all those men who say, "Why buy the cow when
you can get the milk for free". Here's an update
for you.

Nowadays 80% of women are against marriage, why?
Because women realize it's not worth buying an
entire Pig, just to get a little sausage...

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post #2 of 20 (permalink) Old 04-05-2005, 11:39 AM
 
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that was good
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post #3 of 20 (permalink) Old 04-05-2005, 12:15 PM
 
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post #4 of 20 (permalink) Old 04-25-2005, 07:03 PM
 
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Picking on the south is way too easy. Dats funny anyhows even roun heyuh!
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post #5 of 20 (permalink) Old 04-25-2005, 07:14 PM
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dagone, that right there was funny, i dont care who you are



"It takes alot of anything to make my bike to something"
2001 RC51
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post #6 of 20 (permalink) Old 04-25-2005, 11:48 PM Thread Starter
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Quote:
Originally Posted by drewpy
dagone, that right there was funny, i dont care who you are

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post #7 of 20 (permalink) Old 04-26-2005, 08:29 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by drewpy
dagone, that right there was funny, i dont care who you are
Get-er-Done
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post #8 of 20 (permalink) Old 04-27-2005, 12:21 PM
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you might be a red neck if....you reply to this thread



"It takes alot of anything to make my bike to something"
2001 RC51
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post #9 of 20 (permalink) Old 04-27-2005, 02:31 PM
 
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The south will kick the norths a$$ anyday except the years 1856-1859.
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post #10 of 20 (permalink) Old 04-27-2005, 04:42 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by drewpy
you might be a red neck if....you reply to this thread
Whew..I'm safe then...




-Chris
aka Gas Man



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is me till the
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post #11 of 20 (permalink) Old 04-27-2005, 04:43 PM
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Damn it!! I did it... I'm a redneck now...

Now what do I do?




-Chris
aka Gas Man



Was: 2002 Kaw ZX-9R
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post #12 of 20 (permalink) Old 04-28-2005, 12:31 AM Thread Starter
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Put the Kaw out to pasture.
It will make a good lawnmower.

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Currently ride 1987 GSXR 50, 1996 Ducati M900, 2005 GSXR 1000
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post #13 of 20 (permalink) Old 04-28-2005, 12:52 AM
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Ya right!




-Chris
aka Gas Man



Was: 2002 Kaw ZX-9R
IS:


is me till the
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post #14 of 20 (permalink) Old 04-28-2005, 12:59 AM Thread Starter
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Or just put it in the front yard on blocks.

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post #15 of 20 (permalink) Old 04-28-2005, 07:03 AM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jeeps84
Or just put it in the front yard on blocks.

I thought it was on blocks a few weeks ago?
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post #16 of 20 (permalink) Old 04-28-2005, 09:20 AM Thread Starter
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Yep, its offical.
Gas Man is a Redneck.
Thanks Twisty, I forgot about that.

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post #17 of 20 (permalink) Old 04-28-2005, 09:30 AM Thread Starter
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Hey Gas Man;
At least you are a high-tec Red neck.
I only see one block.
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Last edited by jeeps84; 04-28-2005 at 09:32 AM.
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post #18 of 20 (permalink) Old 04-28-2005, 04:11 PM
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Actually that's not a jack stand... that's a piece or leg of the mc lift... so I'm clear of that!




-Chris
aka Gas Man



Was: 2002 Kaw ZX-9R
IS:


is me till the
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post #19 of 20 (permalink) Old 04-28-2005, 07:20 PM
 
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jeeps84
Put the Kaw out to pasture.
It will make a good lawnmower.
Best thing I heard all week.. Then you can buy a real bike - guess what brand???
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post #20 of 20 (permalink) Old 04-29-2005, 06:34 AM
 
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Late

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