OOOHHH YES!! Right here in good ole Tally, we have a winner...
Tallahasseean charged with breach of peace
Local prosecutors are apparently in a bind: How do they charge a blind Tallahassee man who has been accused of having sex with his Seeing Eye dog?
Florida, like many other states, has no bestiality statute - that is, a law specifically prohibiting sexual contact between humans and animals.
So Alan Yoder, 29, originally was charged with felony animal cruelty, but court records show that charge was dropped last Friday and replaced with a misdemeanor - disorderly conduct.
Yoder now is charged with a "breach of the peace, by engaging in sexual activity with a guide dog," according to a court document.
Yoder, reached by telephone Thursday, declined to be interviewed. James D. Varnado, his attorney, said he has filed a not-guilty plea on his client's behalf but declined to discuss details of the case.
"However lurid the allegations may be, we should resist a rush to judgment," he said.
Here's what happened, according to Tallahassee police reports:
Yoder, who lives in a local apartment complex, last month asked a female acquaintance to join him in a sex act with the dog, a male yellow Labrador named "Lucky."
She demurred, but later told a friend about it. That person called a social worker, who called police.
Investigators spoke to Yoder on June 16, who admitted performing certain sex acts with the dog, even going into detail with them, but denied doing others. He was arrested and booked June 22, charged with animal cruelty...
Dayum, When I get called for Jury Duty, I get a simple DUI manslaughter case...